


Were we always meant to say goodbye?

by deadlyyprincess



Category: Prison Break (TV), The 100 (TV)
Genre: Artist Clarke, Crossover, F/F, F/M, Heartbreak, M/M, POV Bellamy, POV Clarke, Parallel world
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-07-23
Packaged: 2018-11-30 08:21:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11459721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadlyyprincess/pseuds/deadlyyprincess
Summary: Six years, 2192 days Clarke had to wait for Bellamy to get out of prison. The worst six years of her life. But she did wait, without a problem, if in the end, it meant that she would be together with Bellamy, having the happy ending they deserve, after a life full of shit.But what happens when instead of a happy ending she gets Bellamy on a hospital bed, fighting for his life?





	1. Two days or maybe less?

**Author's Note:**

> Ok, firts things first. I can't belive I'm doing this, I'm so excited, yet so nervous, since this is my first time, publishing a fic on here.
> 
> So, of course this fic has been inspired by the season finale of The 100, but instead of the future, they are living in our days. Also, it's kind of a crossover between The 100 and Prison Break since I love Bellarke and Misa and I thought, I should give it a try.
> 
> I really hope you will enjoy this fic, also before you get confused there will be flashbacks in this fic so yeah, thought I'd let you know.

Clarke Griffin, 23 year old artitst who lived in London with her best friends Raven Reyes and Sara Tancredi. She woked at a small art gallery, always had her coffee with milk, whipped cream and chocolate chips on top. Alwyas had a pencil in her bag, just in case. Pretty good life, right? Hmm, now maybe, before, not so much.

 

Clarke hasn't had a perfect life, no, not even close. But she had enough. She had _him,_ who would be back with her in two days, which may or may not feel like so much longer.

 

 

6 years. 2192 days. Or how Clarke prefered to call it:torture. That was how long she had to wait for _him_. 6 damn years without _him._ Her life hasn't been easy at all but those years were the worst. But the thought of seeing him again in just two days made everything a bit easier. Two fucking days. Forty eight hours.

 

Clarke couldn't say she didn't have her life figured out. She did, it just... could you blame her she wasn't exactly feeling like herself without him? Two days, she reminded herself. She kind of hated the number two. And six. And two thousand one hundred ninety four.

 

Two days didn't seem that much to most of the people. But to Clarke, two days seemed like an eternity, because after 6 years, even one more hour without his big, soft, brown eyes, his strong, protective arms around her, without trying to count the freckles on his face and tangling her fingers in his messy curls, without feeling his lips on hers,felt that way, like an eternity.

 

Anyway, back to her day, which was a Thursday, normal day. Coffee in hand, music on, sun shining. Two days until she finally could see Bellamy again.Everything good, right? Wrong. Because Clarke wasn't Clarke Griffin, unless she was a clumsy mess, with her thoughts all over the place, which usually wasn't a problem, not at all. But life always had this obsession in proving Clarke wrong.

 

You know when you think, you really think that nothing bad, nothing unexpected can happen, because everything goes as planned, but that's when...boom... something bad, something unexpected happens. Yes, Clarke was about to know that feeling very well, as if she didn't already know it well enough.

 

Because hey, she needed to be on time at work so it didn't matter if she crossed the street without paying too much attention to the road,she did it too many times to count, thinking at a certain handsome guy, nothing could happen, right? Wrong. Well, nothing happened to her, but something certainly did happen, to the dark haired man who did pay attention and did save Clarke but couldn't save himself from the crash.

 

Life was the biggest bitch of all.

 

_Breathe._

 

_In._

 

_Out._

 

_Into your nose._

 

_Out through your mouth._

 

_Into your nose._

_Out through your mouth._

 

_Just breathe._

 

 

 

Clarke did breathe, she did everything possible to focus on her breathing so that she could just calm down and get the hold of the situation. But her brain wouldn't cooperate . Blood everywhere. _Him_  laying on the ground unconcious. Her mind went blank.

 

  
"Oh my god"

 

"What happened?"

 

"Someone call an ambulance"

 

"Yeah, I have an emergency here..."

 

  
*

 

 

Fuck it. Fuck headaches. Did she really have to wake up? And that smell. Ughh, so familiar, too familiar. She hated it.

"Clarke? Are you ok?", she heard a voice. She knew it, but couldn't quite pinpoint whose it was.

"Clarke? Hey, how are you feeling?" Right, it was Harper, a nurse from the hospital, Sara worked at.

"What happened?", she asked more confused then ever. She was heading to work and... the car... crash... dark curls... pushed her...Bellamy

  
_Breathe_

 

_In_

 

_Out_

 

_Just breathe_

 

 

  
"Clarke, calm down, relax, just lay back."

 

"Where is he? What happened? ", she found herself asking, even though she barely could breathe with tears rushing down her cheeks. When did she start crying,anyway?

 

"Clarke, please calm down, he's in surgery ok? You passed out. But he's in good hands, Sara is with him, he's gonna be okay, just calm down!"

 

Suddenly, calming down became an impossible task. After minutes, which seemed like hours, her breathing became normal again or as normal as it could get.

 

"I need to see him", she eventually said, already getting out of bed, only to be stopped by Harper.

 

"Clarke, you can't, he's still in surgery, but Sara promised that you are gonna be the first to hear news about him. He is gonna be okay, he's too stubborn to die.", Harper chuckled and Clarke knew she was right, she knew her friend was trying to make her feel better, but laughing, it kinda hurt with the situation at hand.

 

Life truly was a joke. She waited 6 years for him. And of course the bastard didn't tell her, he was out of prison, of course he wanted to surprise her, but of course the universe or life or God or whatver had another surprise planned for her and could you blame her that she absolutely hated it? Couldn't she get at least a bit of happiness for once? All she ever wanted was a happy life with Bellamy and now she might lose that too. 

 

 

 

_6 years ago_

_"Princess you are tired as hell, let me drive."_

 

_"Bellamy, it isn't such a long drive, I can do it", she insisted._

 

_"Princess,you haven't slept at all last night! You were too busy planning every single moment of this trip, which don't get me wrong, it's adorable but you have to sleep!" They both were extremely stubborn but this time Bellamy was right and Clarke knew it. Besides, that little smirk of his was pretty convincing._

 

_"Bell..."she whined again._

 

_Desperate times were asking for desperate meassures so Bellamy picked her up,bridal style, put her in the passenger seat, put her seatbelt on and started driving. Sure enough, she was asleep within five minutes._

 

_They were heading to Brighton, a two days trip, for them, because they deserved it. Clarke had finally found a job that she actually liked, Bellamy was happy for her, so they decided they should celebrate...alone, in a more special way._

 

_God, was it even legal to be that beautiful? She finally got some sleep, which was good but Bellamy just couldn't get his eyes off of her adorable sleeping face. She looked so at peace. Some strands of her golden hair were sprawled on her angelic face. She even had a little tiny smile on. Bellamy had no idea how she managed to look so effortlessly flawless._

 

_He really was a lucky guy, because Clarke wasn't just beautiful. She was independent, smart, strong and beautiful, yeah. But in that specific order. And he loved her so goddamn much. She was the one for him. And even though, she was just 18 and he was just twenty, he just knew that he would love her forever._

 

_So yeah, being too caught up in the beauty of his princess, as he has been calling her since he was ten and thoughts of their future together, they were caught in an accident._

 

_It all happened so fast, that when Bellamy noticed the girl crossing the street it was too late to pull the brakes._

 

_He got six years of prison for damage by misadventure._

 

 

 

 

Clarke wasn't exactly the best person, nor a fucking hero, but she found herself one too many times in the situation where she just had to ask whoever or whatever was doing it to her, what had she done so wrong that whenever she finally thought she got to be happy, someone decided to push her back to the ground and let her be miserable.

 

Bellamy was everything to her. Her heart, her world, her home, her family, which was a completely unknown concept to Clarke since she was abandoned when she was a baby and "delivered" from foster parents then back to the orphanage then back to foster parents and so on, but Bellamy thought her what family meant. He has been doing anything for her, to protect her since she was a little girl in that damn orphanage. She couldn't live without him and he knew it. He had to come back to her. He couldn't die. Not now, not after all they have been through.

 

  
2 hours later, still no news of him. The only thing that changed was that Octavia and Raven arrived too, which helped a little at least now, Clarke wasn't left alone with the desperation inside of her.

 

"He'll be fine. I mean, he's Bellamy!", Raven said confidently, trying to lighten the mood like she always did.

 

Clarke smiled, but it was one of the fakest smiles, she ever plastered on her face. God, the waiting was killing her. She thought that two days felt like an eternity but every minute without knowing how he was,felt like pure torture.

 

Another hour passed and finally Sara was in front of them, her hair a mess, her hands shaking. Just by looking in her friene's eyes  Clarke knew, that the torture, the agony, she had been feeling for the past three hours, the not knowing if Bellamy would be okay, wouldn't be ending soon.

 

"How is he? He is okay right? Please tell me he's fine!", Clarke said, her voice cracking, her vulnerable side, she almost never showed, coming out, but she could care less about that.

 

"We were able to stop the bleeding but...", Sara stopped, it was hard to say it. The three girls in front of her were her best friends. She knew how hard would it be on them. Hell, it was extremely hard on herself too. She didn't know Bellamy very well, but they were close. He made Clarke happy and he was Octavia's brother so of course Sara cared about him.

 

"But what?", Octavia asked, half angry, half desperate.

"The impact was big and he is...umm.. he...well... Bellamy is...."

 

"He's what? Just say it Sara!", Clarke snapped, she couldn't take it anymore, she just wanted to know, because dead, he couldn't be. He was... he was fine. Right?

 

"He's unresponsive, he entered in a coma, he's stable, but we don't know... if he's gonna wake up."

 

"If?", Clarke asked, eyes already glossy. The didn't know _if_  he was going to wake up. But he was, he had to be. Those 6 years didn't just pass only for her to say goodbye to him now. Goodbye wasn't a thing for them. They fought through the shit, life put them through. They survived. _Together_. He couldn't stop now.

 

"I need to see him!", the blond said, without even realizing she said it.

"Yeah of course, come with me!"

 

The three girls followed their friend until they arrived to a scene, which was almost unbearable. Behind the glass, there was Bellamy with monitors and tubes surrounding him. He looked like he was sleeping, exept, he wasn't.

 

"We did all we could, now it's up to him", Sara said, putting a hand on Clarke's shoulder, the other on Octavia's, letting them know that she was there for them, no matter what.

 

"I'll go to get some coffee.", Raven said, being then followed by Sara to the cafeteria. They knew, Clarke and Octavia needed to be alone.

 

 

"Hey, big brother", the brunette said, grabing his left hand, after the girls finally gathered the courage to enter the room.

 

Clarke grabbed his right hand. She didn't say anything, she couldn't. That damn beeping wasn't doing any good either. It just terrified her, the thought of it stopping haunting her.

 

He looked so peaceful. His curls, a mess, as usual, his plumpy lips, parted, he almost looked as if he was asleep. _Almost_. The tubes down his throat though, the beeping, the needle in his vein were a pretty good reminder that he wasn't just asleep, that he may actually never wake up.

 

But Clarke couldn'think that way, she had to have hope, for Bellamy to wake up, for them to finally be happy, to finally be free.

 

They had it all planned, that when Bellamy got out, they will gather money and travel the world, together. Bellamy was a known history nerd and Clarke was a passionate artist, them together on the road, getting to know different people, different cultures. Perfect dream, right? Clarke had to hope, that it wasn't just a dream. She had to belive that he would wake up and they would make it happen. Maybe not as early as planned, but still.

 

Later in the night, Lincoln Burrows,Octavia's boyfriend came to take her home. They have been living together for the past two years. Lincoln was Michael Scolfield's brother, Sara's boyfriend and Bellamy's former cellmate. He got out six months ago. Clarke assumed, he was with Sara somewhere in the hospital.

 

Lincoln had to beg Octavia to sleep at their house. She was known to be a "stubborn pain in the ass" as Bellamy called her. With a little help from Clarke, they finally managed to convince her to go with Lincoln.

 

"Don't worry, O, we'll take turns, tonight I'll stay with him, you need to rest."she'd said. Sara had managed to convince her boss to let them stay with Bellamy through the night.

 

"Okay, but call me, if anything happens."

 

"Absolutely."

 

  
"So it's just you and me now huh?", Clarke repeated Bellamy's words from so many years ago, little after Octavia and Lincoln had left.

 

God, he managed to still look handsome, even with tubes in him. He was paler, but the freckles were still noticable, sprinkled around his face, like the stars on the nightsky.

 

 

 

 

 

_She was really focused on the task at hand. And that was counting Bellamy's freckles. She traced them, trying to get them in an order , so she won't forget which she counted and which she didn't._

 

_"What are you doing?", Bellamy asked, his voice thick with sleep, his eyes still closed. God, Clarke adored his sleepy voice, it was better then any song, she could ever hear._

 

_They were in her new bought apartment. Sara had been sleeping at one of her classmates the other night, Raven had had a night out with friends and Octavia still lived with Bellamy at the time so that gave the two lovers a night and morning all to themselves._

 

_"Shh", Clarke said, more focused then ever "I'm trying to count yout freckles."_

 

_Bellamy chuckled and turned the other side, knowing it would annoy the hell out of Clarke._

 

_"Bellamy!", she whined, slapping his back, playfully._

 

_"What princess?", he mocked her, turning to face her again, his deep brown eyes open, staring into her ocean ones. Suddenly her annoyance towards him disappeared. She was too lost in his dark eyes._

 

_"What did you want to say?", he got closer, placing soft kisses on Clarke's neck, knowing very well it was her weakness._

 

_She let a soft moan escape her mouth and tilted her head back so he could get better acces. Damn, he was good._

 

 

 

 

 

  
Clarke smiled at the memory, she missed his lips on her neck, it has been a long time ago, too long.

 

That voice in her head, that terrifying voice reminded her that she may never feel his lips on her neck again.

 

 _Stop_   _it,_ she told herself. She looked at him again, squeezing his hand.

 

"You can't die on me, Bellamy Blake! You won't die on me!",she said, hoping that through some miracle, he would hear her. Sara told her, that it was possible at pacients, who were in a coma.

 

She caressed his pale, yet soft cheek, then kissed it. If only, he could actually feel that.

 

"Remember the first time I did that?", she asked knowing perfectly well she wouldn't get an answer. "You looked like you've just seen a ghost or something" A small, but sad laugh escaped her mouth.

 

 

 

  
_17 years ago_

 

_Bellamy was getting food for him and Octavia. They have been there for almost three months. Octavia was only two years old, she had no idea how much of a mess there was in their lives, oblivious to the cruel reality and Bellamy really wanted to keep it that way._

 

_They were living in an orphanage but that didn't mean Bellamy wouldn't do anything to keep his little sister safe and happy. She was all he had, after all. His sister, his responsability, just like his mother told him._

 

_Their mother had died from breast cancer three months ago and both Bellamy's and Octavia's fathers left when they had found out Aurora was pregnant. They had no other relatives. So it was just him and Octavia._

 

_"Bellamy!", a boy came to him. Bellamy couldn't remember his name._

 

_"What is it?"_

_"Your sister.", the little boy answered, fear clear in his eyes. Bellamy managed to let all the kids know that he would do anything to protect his baby sister. The little ones were scared of him. The older ones, not so much but Bellamy didn't give a damn about that. He would keep his promise to his mother, no matter what it took._

 

_In matter of seconds, Bellamy was next to Octavia, who was sittinh in the yard, grabbed her tiny head, checking for any injury. She was fine, but she was crying and Bellamy could feel the anger boiling inside of him. Whoever hurt her,would pay._

 

_"What is it O, what's wrong?", he asked, desparation clear in his voice. The little girl pointed in the direction where Ontari and Echo, girls Bellamy knew well, too well were hitting another girl, clearly, younger then them._

 

_Bellamy hasn't seen her before,  supposed she was new. She looked so tiny, so helpless. He had to do something._

 

_"Leave her alone!", he yelled at the two girls._

 

_Ontari was Roan's sister, who was one year older then Bellamy. The siblings hated Bellamy since the first day him and Octavia were dropped there. Echo was Ontari's best friend. He hated her too._

 

_"Stop that!"_

_"What are you gonna do, Bellamy?", Echo asked him with that annoying voice of hers. She was pushing his buttons, but he would never hit a girl so he clenched his fists, trying to calm down._

 

_"Two against one? That's low, even for you! Get out of here!"_

 

_"You don't make the rules!", Echo answered. God, Bellamy couldn't stand her, but he wasn't going to let them hurt the innocent ,girl so he gently took her hand and lead her back to Octavia, who started calming down once she saw, that the little blond girl was out of trouble. Octavia had such a good heart, which scared Bellamy a little, he thought that being kind meant also being naive. Especially in a place like that._

 

_Bellamy was tall for a boy who turned ten years old recently, so he had to bend down so he could get to the little blond girl's level. Now that he was closer to her, he could see her ocean blue eyes, her porcelain face, he could notice how golden her hair actually was, like a princess'. She was beautiful._

 

_"What's your name?", he asked softly with a voice, that he used only when talking to Octavia. Not anymore, though._

 

_"Clarke", she answered, not quite looking at him. She was scared,he could tell._

 

_"I'm Bellamy and this is my sister, Octavia"_

 

_"Hi", the two year old answered, waving her tiny hand at Clarke._

 

_"Hi", the blond answered._

 

_"Are you okay?", Bellamy asked, gently touching her shoulder. She looked so innocent, yet, so fragile, Bellamy was afraid, he might break her at any moment._

 

_"Yeah, I am now...thank you Bellamy.", she said and then smiled, her fear slowly fading away, the light in her eyes appearing and making it hard for Bellamy to breathe. He was only ten years old, but he was pretty sure, that Clarke was a true princess, just like the ones, his mother used to read him about, who certainly was in the wrong place._

 

_She got close to him and placed a soft kiss on his cheek, shocking Bellamy as if he indeed saw a ghost. But she wasn't a ghost, she was a princess, his princess._

 

_Then Clarke walked away, but Bellamy stayed in shook for God knows how long. It was as if he was under a spell. The princess' spell._

 

 

  
It was a bittersweet feeling remembering even the tinest details from all those years ago. But Clarke was known for having one of the greatest memory. She remembered literally everything. And with Bellamy, there was no exeption. There wasn't one moment with him, that she couldn't remember.

 

She just hoped they would still be able to make new memories. Bellamy's coma was just another obstacle in their journey to a happy life. Right?

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Kalopsia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> =the delusion of things being more beautiful then they really are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so this is the second chapter, a bit late, I know, I'm sorry, anyway hope you'll enjoy it 
> 
> And again, before you get confused, besides flashbacks there will be parts of the chapter where the action basically happens in Bellamy's head while he's in coma

 

 

_He could feel his senses coming back to life. The pain in his neck. What the hell? And that smell. A bit salty. The sound of waves. It sounded very much like he was at the ocean._

 

_He couldn't help it anymore. Bellamy had to open his eyes. He was blinded by the sunlight, still he adjusted quickly so he could take in his surroundings. Yes, it defineatly was the ocean. The sun, the waves crushing together was heavenly. Like a painting ripped from a museum. Except everything was real. Or so it seemed, at least._

 

_The calming feeling was quickly replaced by panic, though, once Bellamy realized that he had no clue, where he actually was or any memory of how he actually got there._

 

_He looked around, no people, no houses, no nothing. Just him, the sand under his feet, the ocean and the sky above him with no trace of clouds._

 

_He started walking around, struggling to find anything that could indicate where he was. Because no matter how beautiful everything was, he had to go home. To her._

 

_And just like that, with no warning, he heard a voice. That voice. The voice, he could recognize everywhere. Her voice._

 

_First, he was too afraid to turn around, thinking it might just be another dream, like the thousands he has had in prison and that she would disappear but when he did finally gather the courage to turn around, the sight in front of him couldn't compare with any ocean._

 

_He caught her right on time. And there was no doubt it was her. It was Clarke. And he had her in his arms, after all those years, Bellamy could finally hold her and feel her heart beating against his._

 

_Her signature scent, roses mixed with paint, filled his nosetrills. God, he had missed her scent, he had missed her._

 

_After minutes of holding each other, they let go so Bellamy could see her, make sure, she was real, that she was his Clarke right there. He touched her cheeks, her hair, her shoulders, her arms, her hair._

 

_She was looking right back at him, with those ocean eyes of hers. He couldn't resist the urge anymore. Bellamy pressed his lips on Clarke's. Damn, it felt good._

 

_There was nothing gentle about that kiss. It was only filled with hunger, lust and desire. He bit her lip and she automatically opened her mouth, their tongues starting dancing together._

 

_It felt good, it felt right, it felt real. It felt, like she was the air, he had been craving for the past six years._

 

_Bellamy wasn't very religious, but in that moment he was feeling as if he was in heaven._

 

  
                        *

 

_  
They were lying on the ground, Bellamy holding Clarke, who was sitting on his lap, admiring the view in front of them. It felt good, yeah. But something in the back of Bellamy's mind just couldn't let him enjoy the moment, completely._

 

_"Clarke?"_

 

_"Yeah?", she turned to face him. And that was when he realized, she hadn't change at all, actually. Yeah, her hair was blonder, but besides that she looked just like she did six years ago._

 

_"Bell?", Clarke pulled him out of his thoughts. "What is it?", she asked softly, it sounded angelic, really._

 

_"Princess, where are we?", he asked, pulling some of her hair strands, behind her ear. The whole place was fantastic, yes, but he needed to know where exactly was that place._

 

_But Clarke didn't seem surprised by his question at all. It looked like she was expeciting it and knowing perfectly well what to answer._

 

_"In your mind.", she said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world._

 

_Maybe it was, for her, but for Bellamy, it was the most confusing thing, he ever heard._

 

_However, all the questions inside his head, disappeared when he felt Clarke's lips against his._

 

_"It doesn't matter where we are as long as we are together, remember?"_

 

 

 

  
"It doesn't matter where we are as long as we are together, remember?", Clarke said, looking at Bellamy's sleeping body. "That's what you told me, you have to keep that promise, okay? You have to come back, so that we actually can be together, Bell!", she said, her voice breaking. She was on the verge of tears. It was the third time in ten hours. Clarke hated when she was crying. It made her feel weak and she hated that too. But she couldn't help herself. Seeing Bellamy in that state, it was the hardest thing she had to bear. Besides, the memories of him and her together weren't doing any good to her pain either.

 

 

 

 

**_8 years ago_ **

_"Bellamy, I'm scared.", she said, tears rushing down her cheeks._

 

_"Hey, hey princess, why are you crying?", he wiped her tears off. Bellamy hated that sight of her. When Clarke was sad, he couldn't help but be sad too._

 

_They had been together for almost six months. They were drunk at a party, which they snuk off to when Clarke had kissed him for the first time._

 

_They had managed to learn every way of going in and out of the orphanage without anyone noticing. Well, anyone, but Octavia, who was butthurt every time they left her alone. But every time, even though it meant Bellamy getting pissed, Clarke promised her that when the right time would come, she could join them._

 

_So yeah, they both were drunk when it happened, but that didn't mean they couldn't remember it the following day. They just couldn't hide the fact that they were in love with each other anymore. They both have been for a pretty long time._

 

_First it was hard, because of Bellamy, who kept insisting that Clarke was too young and denying the fact that he loved he, that she was so much more then just his sister's best friend or his own friend, for that matter. He couldn't resist much, though_

_But now they were faced with another challenge, beacause Bellamy would be eighteen in one month, which meant, he was going to leave the orphanage. To leave Clarke._

 

_He had already thought about ways to get Octavia's custody, once he got out but Clarke's, that was impossible._

 

_"Hey, look at me!", he said firmly, cupping her face in his large hands. He could see the terror and the sadneaa in her eyes and he was just as scared as her. Being away from her, not knowing if she was okay or safe, haunted his thoughts, but he had to seem strong for her, so he did._

 

_"It doesn't matter where we are, as long as we are together,okay?"_

 

 

 

 

"Clarke?", Octavia's voice pulled her out of her memories.

 

"Hey!"

"Hey, O! How are you?", Clarke asked. Stupid question, but she didn't know what else to say. Octavia was one of her best friends, but now, she knew there was nothing to say, that could make her friend feel better, or herself for that matter.

 

"I could ask you the same question."

 

They stayed in silence, after that, looking at Bellamy, praying that he would wake up. None of them could take it anymore. The anxiety was at its highest levels and the terrifying question: " _What_ _if_ _he_ _doesn't_ _wake_ _up?"_ , was coming in both of their minds more and more often.

 

And so a couple of hours passed until Octavia finally decided to tell Clarke that she should go get something to eat.

 

"I'm fine, O, really.", she insisted, but then her stomach grumbled and that was when Clarke actually realized that her friend was right. She was indeed hungry.

 

"Go, I'll stay."

 

"Okay, I'll be back in thirty minutes.", she said, took a quick glance at Bellamy, then walked out the door.

 

 

Clarke didn't really have a big appetite, but she knew, she had to eat something so she settled with some scrambled eggs, which looked edible.

 

She could have gone somewhere else, rather then the hospital's cafeteria, but she prefered not to. She wanted to be as close to Bellamy as possible.

 

"Hey, Clarke!" A voice startled her out of her thoughts. She looked up, to find a pair of blue eyes. Michael.

 

"Michael, hi.", she greeted him. Clarke hasn't seen the guy in a while. He was really nice. And funny. And after he got out of prison, he baiscally was Clarke's bodyguard, because well, Bellamy had made him promise, he would take care of Clarke. It was awkward and very annoying at first, but after a little while, they managed to become really good friends.

 

"How are you?", he asked, concern laid in his voice. He pretended to look strong in front of her, but he was just as devastated as Clarke was, she knew it. After all, he and Bellamy had been cellmates for four years. They bonded really well. Clarke knew, Michael cared about Bellamy. And vice versa. Michael was one of Bellamy's best friends.

 

Besides that, Michael has been Sara's boyfriend since high school. Clarke found it really cute. They were truly meant for each other.

 

They were like the couples in the movies. Relationship goals at its best.

 

However, when the police found drugs in Sara's bag, Michael took the blame for it. He knew, those weren't her drugs. Somebody had put them there. Who? It didn't matter. Michael loved Sara too much to let her go to prison. She was strong, yes, but could never surivive such a place. So Michael did five years and there was where Bellamy met him.

 

 

"Could've been better.", she answered, sorrow laid in her voice. She didn't need to ask him how he was, knowing he was feeling just the same as her.

 

"Hey, he's gonna be fine. He has someone too precious to let go of.", Michael said and Clarke actually, geniunely smiled. It was small, but it was there.

 

Michael was like the brother, she never had. They cared about each other and him being there made it a bit easier to bear.

 

 

When Clarke came back in Bellamy's room, Octavia was telling the story of Augustus to Bellamy, as if he didn't know it all too well. It was his favourite. His mother has read it to him thousands of times.

 

He used to read it to Octavia and later on to Clarke too.

 

 

 

_  
"Okay, time to sleep princess!", he said softly picking her up and putting her in her bed. Although boys were not allowed in the girl's room after eight pm Bellamy was known to be a rebel. He tucked Octavia and Clarke in every night._

 

_Besides all the other girls were thrilled to have him there, so it wasn't much of a problem._

 

_At the time, Clarke was twelve years old and Bellamy fourteen. She couldn't lie to herself anymore, she was developing a crush on him which was pretty weird since they basically hated each other, fighting all day long over the most stupid things, but those kind of moments, when he put her to sleep or when he took care of her when she was sick or when she came back from another foster house and he hugged her so tightly that she stopped breathing for a moment, made Clarke develop that crush on him, which happened to grow day by day. It confused her, annoyed her and made her feel really excited at the same time._

 

_"Tell me a story, Bell!" Even though Clarke wasn't a big history fan, something about Bellamy telling her stories about greek mythology was special. The way his eyes sparkled, the way his voice sounded when he told those stories. Clarke could listen to him all day._

 

 

 

 

"Hey, O", Clarke decided to make her presence known.

 

"Clarke...Michael, hi."

 

Clarke returned to her seat, grabbing Bellamy's hand. He looked just the same, not that Clarke was expecting any different. It hurt , though, seeing him like that. She was known to be a pacient person, but with Bellamy, she couldn't help it. The desepration, the fear of him not waking up was slowly settling in and she was growing nervous minute by minute.

 

"Hey buddy.", Michael broke the silence and put a hand on Bellamy's shoulder. He helped Bellamy a lot, while they were in prison. Bellamy was known to have some anger issues but Michael had helped him to control them. He was a pretty calm guy, usually. Very smart too.

 

"Look, you gotta wake up okay? I can't marry Sara without you by my side.", Clarke smiled. It was sad, though.

 

Him and Sara were supposed to have their wedding at the end of August. It wasn't going to be something big. They both were known to be pretty simple people, didn't need much, just each other.

 

"Besides,...", Michael continued "You have two girls here waiting for you, which is not very nice. A woman must never wait."

 

Both Clarke and Octavis chuckled a bit at Michael's words. If it was for Clarke, she could wait another six years for him if she had to. Hell, she could wait all her life for him. But in all honesty, she had to hope it wasn't the case. Not because she would ever stop loving him. That was impossible, but because she wanted to be with him, to live with him and travel with him just like they had planned all along. _Together_.

 

 

 

 

_"I don't want you to leave."_

 

_Clarke was in Bellamy's arms, her tears staining his shirt. It was one day before Bellamy was going to leave._

 

_It hurt like hell. The thought of not seeing him every day, of waking up and falling asleep next to him. Yeah, they did that. A lot, actually._

 

_"I know, princess, I don't wanna leave either, but it is the law.", he said softly, holding her tightlier._

 

_"The law is stupid", she answered with a grumpy face on. Bellamy laughed at the sight._

 

_That just_   _made_ _Clarke_ _angrier_.

_"It's not funny."_

 

_"I know." He kissed her forhead and for a moment, she forgot about her worries. That was the effect, Bellamy Blake had on her._

 

_"We are going to get through this. Together."_

 

_"Together."_

 

 

 

 

                        *

 

 

_  
"Isn't it beautiful?", Bellamy asked. They were sitting on the beach, tangled together watching the sun setting._

 

_It looked like someone had splashed colors of orange, red and yellow over the sky. So effortlessly perfect_

 

_"It is.", Clarke answered, with something laced in her voice though. Sadness? Maybe._

 

_"What is it?", Bellamy asked concerned._

 

_"Nothing.", she answered, not quite looking at him._

 

_"Clarke, tell me.", he said, tilting her chin up. He knew her better then he knew himself. He could tell, only by the look in her eyes, something was wrong._

 

_"I have to go, Bell.", she said, standing up, just to be followed by Bellamy._

 

_"What? Why?" He didn't want her to leave. Bellamy wanted them to stay like that forever. It was so peaceful, so beautiful. It felt like nothing bad could ever happen. Like they finally had found their safe heaven, which nothing and nobody could touch. He didn't want to leave that place. He didn't want her to leave it either. They could finally live together peacefully. Also, Octavia could come along too. It was everything, he ever wished for._

 

_Clarke kissed him on the cheek and then started walking away from him._

 

_"Clarke, wait!" He started following her, running after her until she was gone. It was like she just disappeared, fading into the distance._

 

 

 

  
"Clarke, we made a deal, we'll take turns. Go get some sleep.", Octavia said. It wasn't like Clarke would get much sleep anyway, but her friend was right.

 

"Okay fine, but...", she started only to be interrupted by Octavia.

 

"I know, I'll call you if anything happens."

 

They hugged, Clarke gave Bellamy a kiss on the cheek and then left.

 

 

 

_  
Desperate was little to explain how he was really feeling. Clarke was gone, God knows where and now Bellamy was left alone there...whatever that place was. He had been walking for at least an hour and nothing changed._

 

_He arrived nowhere. It was like he had been walking in circles and he was still on that same beach._

 

_It was already night, stars shining on the sky, the moon reflecting its light on the water._

 

_Bellamy kept whispering her name hoping she would come back to him. He needed her._

 

_"Bell?" , he suddenly heard a feminine voice. It wasn't Clarke's, it was...._

 

_"Octavia!"_

 

_"Hey, big brother!", she jumped in his arms. He felt like some of the weight of his chest has been lifted._

 

" _Don't worry, she'll come back!", his sister said, as if she could read his mind. She didn't even have to say her name, they both knew who she was talking about._

 

_"I'm glad you're here, O!" He sounded excited, maybe he didn't know where he was but it was beautiful, calming. He always has loved the ocean, never seen it though, well just in pictures, but pictures couldn't compare to the real thing. It has been a dream of his to actually see it and it had been fullfilled._

 

_"Isn't it beautiful?"_

 

_"It truly is.", Octavia answered. She wasn't much of an ocean lover, she prefered the mountains, Bellamy knew._

 

_"Look!", she suddenly exclaimed, pointing at the sky. It was a shooting star._

 

_Bellamy remembered, the first time, he saw one. He was with Clarke. That time he wished, they would be together. He was seventeen at the time._

 

_"What do you wish for?", his sister asked. Bellamy looked at her, thinking for a few moments. What did he wish for? He had Clarke, who was going to come back as Octavia said and he belived her, he had his sister and he had that wonderful place all to himself and to the people he loved. He basically had everything he wanted, right?_

 

" _To stay here forever.", Bellamy eventually answered._

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't be a silent reader and let me know what you thought about it, I'm really curious. Lots of love


	3. Pieces of you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two weeks later, Clarke's 23rd birthday came around. She had starting dreaming about it months ago. Bellamy would have been with her. That has been her expectation at least. Reality, though, it wasn't the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyy, guys, so here is the 3rd chapter, I really hope you are happy with the result and enjoy it. Also, warning for this chapter, there will be one mature scene, so if you don't like smut, I suggest you should just skip it.

_**6 years ago** _

 

 

  
_"Good morning, sleeping beauty." Bellamy whispered in her ear. God, it was the best way to wake up. With him and...pancakes? Yes, that defineatly was the smell of pancakes. Could she love Bellamy Blake even more? The andwer to that was yes._

 

_"Did you make me pancakes?", she asked sleepily, yet a grin was plastered on her face._

 

_"Everything for the birthday girl." He kissed her and she kissed back. He even smelled like pancakes._

 

_It was her 17th birthday, but with a bit of luck and the huge help of Bellamy's boss, Marcus Kane, Clarke managed to get out of the orphanage a lot earlier then planned._

 

_Bellamy was working at a bar, named The Ark. Kane took a liking towards Bellamy, treated him like a son and when he heard Clarke's story, he didn't hesitate to adopt her. She couldn't be more grateful for him, doing what he did, for her. Marcus was a nice man. So was his wife, Abby Kane. First, Clarkr was shy around them, they were strangers after all, but soon enough she got attached to them, once she found out, they were good people and were going to treat her like their own daughter._

 

_They also had another adopted child, a little girl, named Madi. Appearently Abby couldn't get pregnant so they decided to adopt. Clarke wasn't exactly a child anymore, but that didn't matter to them. They were good people, who took her in and for that Clarke could never thank them enough._

 

_  
"I love you." , Clarke said, finally opening her eyes._

 

_"Because I make you pancakes?", Bellamy laughed._

 

_"Because you are my soulmate.", she answered with a childish smile on._

 

_Hearing those words out of Clarke's mouth, always made Bellamy's heart skip a beat. She was his princess, his saving grace, his soulmate. Bellamy may have not been a romantic guy but somehow he belived Clarke and he belived that they were meant to be together._

_"I know.", he answered smiling like a child on Christamas day. "Okay, well, princess, here you go.", he said placing a tray with food in front of her._

 

_She smiled at him and kissed him again. She really got lucky. Maybe her parents didn't want her but the man in front of her did. He did not only want her, he also loved her with every piece of his body. She knew that. He wasn't shy to show it, either. And that was all Clarke needed. Bellamy Blake and also his pancakes, once in a while, because pancakes were the best. After Bellamy, of course._

 

_**______** _

_8 hours later Clarke was at Bellamy's and Octavia's apartment, getting ready for her birthday party._

 

_It wasn't going to be something big, just her and close friends going to The Ark, the bar, Bellamy worked at and getting super drunk._

 

_Octavia, whose custody Bellamy got a few months ago, was sitting on the bed, watching Clarke as she got ready. She had a sad face on, because she wasn't allowed to join them, since she was only eleven years old._

 

_She had already given Clarke her present, which was a beautiful summer dress, which Clarke knew, Bellamy had given her money for and a little poem. Octavia was a really talented young writer._

 

_"O, don't be so sad.", Clarke said, sitting next to her and hugging her. She loved Octavia, even though she was a stubborn pain in the ass sometimes, she loved her. Weirdly, even though the girl was just eleven, she was Clarke's best friend._

 

 _She had other friends, yes, well people who were Bellamy's friends but who Clarke bonded really well within a really short amount of time. Still, the young girl remained Clarke's best friend. She was really mature for her age too. They have been together for so long, in that damn orphanage, helping each other and unlike Bellamy, Clarke didn't see Octavia as a little girl who needs protection,_ _she saw her more as an equal, as her friend, who, she, surprisingly, could talk about anything._

 

_"I wanna join you, I wanna be there for you birthday, Clarke!", the little brunette answered._

 

_"But you are here for my birthday. You gave me such a thoughtful present, O, I loved it. Besides, you will get to sleep at Katherine's house tonight, aren't you excited about it?", Clarke asked, acting cheerful. Katherine was one of Octavia's friends, she made at her new school. Marcus had helped her with that too, since he was at Bellamy's house pretty often._

 

_"I guess."_

 

 

__ _**________** _

 

 

_"Okay, okay, so who wants more shots?", Raven asked, even though she was already smashed. They all were, yet they all raised their hands._

 

_Raven was a really cool girl. Clarke felt like she had knew her for all her life. Funny, confident and smart. A great company. Her mother had died a year ago and since then the latina had been all on her own, Clarke admired that the most about her._

 

_"Okay so how about we play Truth or Tequila?", Jasper suggested._

 

_They guy was the weirdest and craziest of them all but that was what made him so unique and Clarke loved that about him. He was funny and always had the jokes by himself._

 

_"Seriously, Jasper? What are you? Fifteen?", Murphy said._

 

_He was the most rude one, but Clarke knew he had a soft heart. He actually grew in an orphange too so Clarke understood him on a pretty deep level._

_To be fair, Clarke was having a really good time. At first, she was shy, not knowing exactly what to do and how to behave around new people, but now she was feeling like she belonged there, with her friends._

 

_"I say, the birthday girl should decide.", Bellamy said looking at his girlfriend lovingly. He was drunk too, still, the sparkle in his eyes, hasn't disappeared._

_**_______** _

 

_  
"Fuck, Clarke", Bellamy said between hungry kisses._

 

_She let out a moan, which went straight to Bellamy's dick._

 

_It was four am, they both were wasted, yet they were in Bellamy's apartment, already high on each other, desperate to taste one another._

 

_She took his shirt off, while he was occupied with her bra. Damn, he looks good, she thought to herself._

 

_"Have you been working out?", she asked biting her lip._

 

_"Turned on, princess?"_

 

_In response, she kissed him roughly, deeply biting his full lip._

 

_"Does that answer your question?"_

 

_His eyes were dark, darker then she ever seen them before. He wanted her and she wanted him, so the clothes disappeared quickly._

 

_He started kissing her, their tongues in each other's mouths. It wasn't like they didn't have time, they did, it was just that they couldn't get enough of each other._

 

_Then he moved on her neck. She tilted it back to give him more acces. First gentle, then he bit her, hard._

 

_"Bellamy!", she half screamed, half moaned._

 

_"So that everyone will know that you are mine.", he said, kissed her and then went back to finish his work. He sucked and bit at the spot, giving Clarke nothing but pleasure._

 

_Mine. Was there anything else, Clarke ever wished for?_

 

_Damn, it felt good. So good, it actually hurt. And the pain felt good too._

 

_She tangled her fingers in his dark curles and pulled them, knowing he loved it._

 

_It wasn't their first time, they knew each other, knew what each other wanted, but that didn't stop either of them, from wanting to explore more and more of one another._

 

_"Fuck", he moaned._

 

_She pushed him, so he would lay on his back, went on top of him, started kissing his well built chest, still pulling that perfect hair of his._

 

_"You like being in charge, princess?" Bellamy smirked at her, which did funny things to her stomach._

  
  
_Before she could answer, he flipped her over and started kissing her neck, sucking on the spot, on which a bruise was going to appear soon enough._

 

_He touched her boobs, squeezing them gently and glazed his lips down, until he reached her right nipple and started to suck it, slowly at first, increasing the speed as he went on._

 

_"Fuck", Clarke moaned. He was good at what he was doing._

 

_"Faster.", she commanded, digging her nails into his back. Bellamy did as he was told._

 

_He lowered his hand to her clit and started rubbing it, while he was still sucking her nipple. That just made Clarke grow louder. The neighbours be dammned._

 

_Bellamy looked back at her, his eyes filled with desire and his signature smirk plastered on his face._

 

 _He kissed her inner thigh, because no matter how much he wanted to just get his fingers into her, Bellamy loved to tease her_ _._

 

_"Please...", she whimpered._

 

_"Please what? What do you want princess, tell me!"_

 

_"I want you...to fuck me with your fingers, your tongue and everything you've got.", she demanded, a fierce look in her eyes._

 

_He smirked at her. As if he wanted any less._

 

_Slowly he pushed his one finger into her to get it out all too soon only to push two fingers into her, touching every spot, he knew, sje wanted him to touch. In matter of seconds, the room was filled with Clarke's screams and moans._

 

_Then, he started tasting her, slowly at first._

 

_"Please...Bell", she whimpered. "Faster."_

 

_"Princess, you taste so good, I wanna eat you out.", he said, breathing heavily._

 

_"Then do it.", she answered, determination filling her voice, a smirk on her face and a sparkle in her eyes._

 

_He did as the princess told her and started fucking her with his tongue, going faster, the moment Clarke's moans grew louder._

 

_Few minutes after, she came into Bellamy's mouth._

_  
"I want you inside me.", Clarke demanded after the tiny break, they took. Frankly, they both were out of breath, covered in sweat. Still, Clarke wanted more._

 

_Bellamy didn't say anything, just got out of bed and came back with a condom in hand only for his dick to get even harder, if that was possible, by the sight in front of his eyes._

 

_Clarke was on all fours, looking all innocent at him, when in fact what was going to happen wasn't innocent at all. God, she is perfect, Bellamy thought._

 

_"You aren't so bad yourself, Mr. Blake. Like what you see?" she said, making Bellamy realize, he spoke his thoughts out loud._

 

_He bit his lip and put the condom on in what could be the fastest time in history._

 

_He gathered her hair in his fist, pulled her head back gently and got his cock near her entrence. She was already dripping wet for him._

 

_"I love what I see, Mrs. Griffin.", he whipered in her ear._

 

_Without warning, he got inside her and stayed like that for a bit, just feeling her around him, then he started thrusting into her, as if it was the last thing he would do on earth._

 

_"God, you feel so good, so fucking good princess.", he whispered, almost out of breath while he was snapping his hips against her._

 

_"Fuck Bell!", she moaned, with him inside her._

 

_"I know, princess, I know.", he answered going at an even faster speed._

 

_Her orgasm came in waves only to be followed by his shortly after._

 

_"That was...", she started saying but she could barely breathe so it was pretty hard to say what she wanted._

 

_"Perfect.", he finished for her._

 

_He turned on one side so he could fully look at her. He pulled some hair strands out of her sweaty face._

 

_"I love you, princess.", he said with the softest voice, she ever heard._

 

_"I love you too, Bell."_

 

_**______** _

 

 

Two weeks later,  Clarke's 23rd birthday came around. She had starting dreaming about it months ago. Bellamy would have been with her. That has been her expectation at least. Reality, though, it wasn't the same. Two weeks later and Bellamy still hasn't woken up.

 

Clarke was trying to keep calm, she really was but to be fair, she was going insane. If she got two hours of sleep at night, she considered herself lucky. She dropped in weight, didn't remember when was the last time she took a proper bath or combed her hair. Yes, she was a wreck, physically. Mentally, it was so much worse.

 

Nightmares, basically every time she closed her eyes more then half an hour. Crying every time she thought about Bellamy or when someone mentioned his name. Her own life has become a never ending nightmare.

 

She actually forgot it was her birthday until Raven had sent her a happy birthday text.

 

It wasn't like she wanted to do anything on her birthday. Or recieve any presents. The only thing she wanted, was for Bellamy to wake up or at least give a sign that he still was there. He has been the same, the only thing that reminded her, he wasn't dead was that damn beeping machine.

 

Too caught in her thoughts, she bumped into someone, while walking to the hospital. It wasn't that far from her apartment so she rather walked there.

 

She was ready to scream at the person, telling them to be more careful, even though it was her fault. But instead, she found a pair of dark eyes, staring back at her. Sucre.

 

"Oh my God, Sucre, hi.", she said, struggling to keep her voice steady. He hugged her and all she wanted to do was cry in that moment, but she wasn't going to. She was tired of people pitying her.

 

"Come on Clarke, let's get you some coffee."

 

"But Bellamy...", she started.

 

"It will be quick.", Sucre answered and surprisingly, she did, as she was told. She didn't have the energy to argue with anyone. Besides, she hadn't seen Sucre in a pretty long time, since he wasn't living in New York.

 

Fernando Sucre was another inmate, Bellamy has met into prison. He got charged for stealing. He was a good guy, though. Clarke appreaciated him a lot. He has basically been hers and Bellamy's cupid all those years ago.

 

 

**_6 years ago_ **

 

_In all honesty, Clarke couldn't remember the last time she was that anxious. It's just Bellamy, she reminded herself._

 

_It has been two weeks since the accident and Clarke was heading to the prison, Bellamy was at. It was her first time she was visiting him there and she was fucking scared._

 

_He has been so cold the last time, she saw him. She could feel him, withdrawing from her. Clarke had to basically force him to say a few words to her. She knew him, she knew how hard everything was for him. Being there, surrounded by criminals, not knowing how Octavia and Clarke were, was killing him slowly._

 

_Bellamy always wanted the best for Clarke and he has never been shy to express that wish and Clarke knew, him being in prison wasn't what he wanted for her. She, on the other hand, could care less about that. As long as they were together, nothing mattered. But she knew, for Bellamy, it wasn't the same, not because she didn't love her, but because he thought, she deserved better, no matter how many times, Clarke had told him, that she didn't want anyone else, but him._

 

 _When she finally arrived, she had to stay in the car for a few more minutes until she finally got the courage to get out. She had been practicing for days now, what she would tell him._ _It was pathetic, really, she was just seeing her boyfriend, her best friend, her soulmate, for fuck's sake._

 

_After the whole procedures, she went into a room, sat at an empty table, waiting imapatiently for Bellamy._

 

_To be fair, that place scared her. She didn't even want to think about what Bellamy must be going through there._

 

_After a while, he finally appeared. She gasped at the sight of him, he was so tired, the dark circles around his eyes, giving away the fact, he barely got any sleep, if he got any. He was pale, the usual tan of his skin was long gone. Even his freckles weren't as noticable as they used to be. It was like seeing a ghost, only a trace of who Bellamy used to be, of the man, who alway had a shininy smile on his face, even in the darkest of times. She hated it. Remembering, he had to spend six years in that place, made her sick._

 

_Bellamy, on the other hand, at the sight of Clarke only broke him more. She deserves better, he reminded himself. It was the truth, Clarke Griffing was a smart, beautiful, independent, brave woman. She could do so much with her life and Bellamy was ou dragging her down._

 

_Clarke went to hug him, it was short. Bellamy barely put her hands around her, but she decided to let that go. They hadn't very much time anyway, so Clarke wasn't going to waste it, by causing a scene because her boyfriend hadn't hugged her tightly enough._

 

_"Hi, Bell.", she said, when they sat down. Her voice was weaker then she wanted it to be._

 

_He wasn't even looking at her. It hurt seeing him that way. And for him, it hurt being near her. He loved her with everything in his being and when you love someone, you need to let them go, right? At least, that was, what Bellamy thought._

 

_"What are you doing here, Clarke?", he asked, as if he didn't know the answer. He still hasn't made eye contact with her. But the fact that he had the nerve to ask her such a stupid question angered her more._

 

_"What do you mean, what am I doing here? I came here to...", she started saying only to be interrupted by Bellamy._

 

_"You should go home, Clarke, this isn't place for princesses.", he said, her voice filled with venom, just like it has been all those years ago, when they were kids and hated each other. Except they weren't kids anymore and that wasn't a kids fight._

 

_"Bellamy, look, I know this isn't easy, but..." He wasn't even listening to her anymore, it was like she was invisible to him. He got up, but Clarke grabbed his arm. She wasn't going to go without a fight and Bellamy knew it. However, he had hoped that she would just let him go. He had never deserved her and he never would._

 

_Clarke had figured out what he wanted to do, he wanted to break up with her, thinking she deserved better, then a man who's got six years to stay in prison. But the thing was, she didn't want better, she wanted him._

 

_"Clarke, go home, you have nothing to do here.", he said, not even having the damn courage to look her in the eye. Clarke could feel the rage, boiling inside of her._

 

_He turned to walk away and Clarke was prepared to stop him, to knock some sense into him, to tell him that she loves him and that she was going to wait for him, but another man was faster then her._

 

_"Look, fish, I know that's not my business but what the fuck is wrong with you?"_

 

_Fernando Sucre, Bellamy immediatelt recognized the guy. He was a friend of his cellmate, Michael Scolfield. Too damn nosy for Bellamy's liking._

 

_The man was mexican, Clarke could tell by his appearance and his accent. She didn't know the guy but something was telling her that he would help her out someway or another. His eyes told her, he was a good man._

 

_"Excuse me?", Bellamy asked, his fists balled together at his side, jaw clenched. He was angry, which only made Clarke more anxious. Bellamy angry was never a good thing._

 

_"Ok, I suppose you didn't see the woman who just walked out of here, but she's the love of my life okay? And she's gonna marry someone else and trust me, you don't wanna feel that kind of pain, so instead of being a self loathing bastard, you should be thankful that this girl right here is willing to wait for you." And with that he was gone. Clarke didn't even have the time to thank him. She was actually sad for the man. It was clear, he love the woman, he talked about._

 

_Bellamy didn't have the time to answer Sucre, but his words made him think about Clarke with another person, that wasn't him. The image, made him sick, angry and broke his heart at the same time._

 

_Bellamy turned around and for the first time, he looked her in the eyes. She could see, how sad he was, how broken. Not for him, but for the people outside who were suffering because of where he was. That was Bellamy, always putting others above himself. She hugged him. It wasn't long, though, since the guard stopped them, but Clarke could feel in that moment,  
that not everything was lost._

 

_"I'm sorry.", he said, when they sat back down. Tears were gathering in his eyes, which were once full of light. He had hurt her and the sight of her sad, knowing he was the reason was just adding to his pain._

 

_"It's okay, Bell." She didn't want him to see him that way, just the thought of having to leave him, sent chills down her spine._

 

_"I just...", he started, she could see, he was struggling to express his feelings. Still, Clarke could see right through him now. His big, brown, eyes was telling her everything, she needed to know. That he loved her so much, he wanted the best for her._

 

_"Bell, I know, I know you want the best for me, but you have to understand, that you are the best for me, I love you and six years won't change that!", she said with more determination then she ever had before. They talked after that about normal things, about Clarke's day and how Octavia was._

_Leaving him there, was the hardest thing, she ever had to do. However, she promised, she would be back soon enough and Bellamy could only hope he would survive all the years ahead of him. He had to. For her. She was his hope._

 

**_______**

 

  
"So how's Maricruz?", Clarke asked Sucre, while they were getting their coffee.

 

Eventually, Maricruz, the girl, Sucre talked about all those years ago, didn't marry another man, she waited for Sucre and married him.

 

Now they were having a baby and Clark was happy for them, she really was but that didn't stop her from wanting what they had.

 

She always imagined having a boy, who would be the miniature of Bellamy, dark messy curls, big, shiny brown eyes, tan skin and freckles splashed on his face and girl who would be the miniature of her, ocean blue eyes, golden, blond hair, she would have Bellamy's freckles as well. It was weird, she didn't know the first thing about being a mother, yet she wanted children so badly. Having a family with Bellamy was her biggest dream.

 

They both would wake up together in each other's arms, they would cook breakfest for their little angels, laugh and have a great time, by doing just about everything together. It wouldn't be that hard, would it?

 

"She's really good, sometimes moody, but she's making progress, day by day."

 

Clarke forced a smile. She was happy for her friends, they were making lifes for themselves and their loved ones, she wasn't, but they were and she cared about her friends, she had to be happy for them. Still, she felt jealous. No matter, how hard it was for her to admit, she was jealous of them, of their life. Guilt was another thing she felt. After all how could she be jealous, when her friends were happy? If only, Bellamy was there for her, he always could calm her, tell her all the right things to make her feel better.

 

"Bellamy will be okay, Clarke.", Sucre said. Two weeks ago, she would've hold onto his words with everything, she had. Now, Clarke had a really hard time to truly belive his words. Her hope was slowly fading away. Worst thing was, she wasn't sure how much she was going to fight for it. Without Bellamy, without knowing if he would ever come back to her, even getting out of bed seemed like an impossible task.

 

"Thanks, Sucre.", she said, even though he hasn't been much of a help; Clarke wasn't going to make him feel as bad as she felt.

 

  
She eventually arrived at the hospital. Octavia was there, as Clarke expected since it has been her turn to stay with Bellamy.

 

"How...umm...how is he?", she asked, even though she could see, he hadn't made any progress.

 

"The same.", her friend answered. Her voice raspy, from all the crying, Clarke figured.

 

"Happy birthady, by the way." Octavia hugged her and Clarke hugged her back. A sob escaped her mouth, she couldn't keep it in anymore. Tears followed, shortly after.

  
Her friend was trying to calm her down, caressing her head and hugging her, but that wasn't doing any good.

 

The images of Clarke's nightmares were just going through her mind. Each was beginning differeny, either with Bellamy, on the floor bleeding out, or on a beach with her laughing, or kissing her, or being hit by a car, yet each ended the same. Bellamy was gone, in the end and she was left alone, only to wake up crying and screaming after him.

 

She let go of Octavia and went straight to Bellamy, grabbing his hand tightly. She needed to feel him.

 

"Bellamy, please, please, open your eyes, I can't lose you, please give me a sign, that you are there, that you can hear me.", she said desperately between her sobs and tears. Octavia put a hand on her shoulder, trying to support her friend who was breaking down in front of her.

 

With each tear, another part of Clarke's heart shattered.

 

Clarke has struggled to hold it in, to have hope for so long, but now she broke. Maybe it was the fact, that it was her birthday or the nightmares, that just wouldn't stop, or the fact that she saw Bellamy again,still not getting better but she was devasted.

 

"I need you, Bell, please just come back to me. Please.", she begged, tears staining her cheeks.

 

She didn't even realize Octavia has left, when she turned her head to spot her friend, only to see she was gone.

 

**______**

 

 

_"I need you, Bell!", Clarke said._

 

_Bellamy was back with his princess, on that mysterious beach, lying together on the sand, his arms around Clarke, her head on Bellamy's chest. He chuckled lightly before answering._

 

_"I'm right here, princess., I'm not going anywhere.", he said and then kissed her forhead._

 

_She got up, so she could fully face him. He could see the determination behind her breathtaking eyes. She was worried, desparate even. Bellamy couldn't understand why._

 

_"No, Bell, you don't understand, I need you to come back, this place is beautiful, yes, but you need to go back"_

 

  
"What is it, Sara, what's wrong?", Octavia asked her friend who had called her to meet her in her office.

 

Octavia couldn't stand, seeing Clarke that way so she quickly agreed to go and talk to Sara.

 

Clarke always has been known to be the strong one, the leavel headed one. But when it came down to Bellamy, well, that was a whole another story. Bellamy Blake was Clarke Griffin"s strength, no doubt, but he was also her greatest weakness. Without the other, they just couldn't function properly.

 

"O, this is no easy way of telling you this, but..." Sara didn't meet her friend's eyes. It was bad, Octavia could tell. Suddenly, her heart rate speed up. She just had to hope, it wasn't what she was thinking. Except it was.

 

"Bellamy's doctor thinks, he should be taken off the machines, that keep him alive."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know your opinion on the chapter and the story overall, I really wanna find out what you guys think about it. Do you think Bellamy will eventually wake up? I'm really curious. Until next time, lots of love.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked the first chapter(sorry if there were any typos)I don't know how many more are yet to come but hopefully you will enjoy them. Let me know what your opinion is and what you would like to see next. Lots of love.


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